I was shocked, confused, bewildered
as I entered Heaven’s door,
not by the beauty of it all,
by the lights or its decor.

But it was the folks in Heaven
who made me sputter and gasp,
The thieves, the liars and sinners,
the alcoholics and other trash.

There stood the kid from seventh grade
who swiped my lunch money twice,
next to him was my neighbor,
Who never said anything nice.

Herb, who I always thought
was rotting away in hell,
Was sitting on cloud nine,
looking incredibly well.

I nudged Jesus, “What’s the deal?
I would love to hear your take.
How’d these sinners get up here?
God must’ve made a mistake.”

“And why’s everyone so quiet?
So somber. Give me a clue.”
“Hush child,” said He, “they’re all in shock,
No one thought they’d see you!”

Keep your fork


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