Mutual Orgasm

For some reason or other we stopped for lunch the other day at an Arby’s rather than at a Hardee’s. I usually don’t listen to what other diners are talking about, but if the conversation is always this good, I’m going to stop at Arby’s more often.

It was a few minutes after noon and the place was filling up fast. We got our order and found a place to sit at a table. I checked my blood and took my shot before unwrapping my sandwich. I happened to notice two elderly ladies sitting at the next table. I didn’t pay much attention to them, at that time, andĀ started to eat. Evidently, either one or possibly both of them were a little hard of hearing as they talked rather loudly. Not knowing there names, I’ll call them Ethel and Mabel. Their conversation went something like this:

Ethel said, “You know, Mabel, I’ve been reading this ‘Sex and Marriage’ book and all they talk about is ‘mutual orgasm’.

All of a sudden, I put down my sandwich and started to pay a little less attention to my lunch and to what the Pickle Queen was saying and I listened a little more closely to Ethel and Mabel’s conversation. Who knows, maybe I could learn something new.

Ethel continued, “Mutual orgasm here and mutual orgasm there. That’s all they talk about. Tell me, Mabel, when your husband was alive, did you two ever have mutual orgasm?”

I didn’t dare try to get any more iced tea through that little sucky tube sticking in my glass for fear of slurping and missing Mabel’s answer. I put the glass down and hoped that the PQ wouldn’t ask me anything.

Mabel sat there, evidently, thinking or trying to remember.

Not knowing how long she’d take to answer, I decided it was safe to take a quick sip of tea. Then it happened.

Mabel slowly shook her head and said, “No, I think we had State Farm.”

Tea shot out of my nose, the PQ grabbed a couple of napkins to wipe it off her face and glasses and I learned to pay attention to what I was doing. While I was up refilling my glass, the two elderly gals must have gotten up and left as their table was empty when I returned. Hopefully they didn’t get any overspray from my little mishap.

Keep your fork

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